Saturday, April 20, 2013

Self Proclaimed "Modest Home Wrecker"

I met him when I was in the eighth grade at a UMass band day. I was so uncomfortable because my first thought was "they put me right next to an attractive guy while I'm wearing a shako." I planned on ignoring that fact, but as we were playing he leaned over and said "if you play on the upper rim of the drum it's easier." That's right, my Prince Charming telling me I'm messing up. Well he afterward asked a friend my name and we would chat on Aim every now and then, mostly about music. That same year he got a girlfriend, and I was pretty sure I had to consider him off the market. For three years he stayed with her until I really started falling for him. I would skip lunch just to spend time with him, and he even stayed after for districts and went out to eat with me. We spent that whole afternoon around the school together. I would stay up until 3am texting him. Then one day on my formspring, someone asked me who I liked and why I didn't just go for them. I stupidly gave most of the story without using any names, and after they were through with their questions, I got a Facebook message from him. He said the questions were from his girlfriend, and that he didn't really like me in that way and he was sorry if he lead me on. It was absolutely the worst, and most embarrassing day of my life. About a week went by of sort if awkwardness when I got a text from him saying he was done with Liz. He told me about everything, including how tough it was to leave her because she was going through a rough time. He never intended for it to go on that long and she had made him send me that Facebook message. He was able to take a break, but still felt bad, so it went for quite some time. He asked me if we could just be really good friends - not implying anything extra than simple friendship because I don't do that. I agreed even though I wanted him as my own. I went about my last year of high school, not talking to him nearly as  much as I would have liked to, but I had to accept that he was having a hard time breaking someone's heart. During the early winter of my last year in high school, he texted me out of the blue, about an issue I had with a teacher that had long since been resolved. It was strange, but I told him that it was fine. He then asked me if I still liked him which hadn't been a topic of choice for over a year. My heart was racing as I said "I know I could, but I can't go through the same thing all over again."

He broke the news to me. He had finally left her. He still had feelings for me. He was surprised about the fact that he never stopped thinking about me and considering me. He wanted to take things slow, but he wanted something. I jumped out of bed and shook my younger sister awake in the wee hours of the morning because I needed to tell SOMEBODY. My heart was exploding. After that night he would come see me at work, every time I worked. He would hang around and talk to my dad, who was my boss at the time, and wait for me to come back from waiting tables.

There was one night at that restaurant that I sat out in his truck with him for three hours just talking for what felt like two minutes. He was so easy to be around. Two days after my birthday he asked me to be his girlfriend, and almost a year later, I love him just as much as I did all of those nights before. :)

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