"She is the most human person I know"

We started when I wasn't ready.

I had just been through a breakup, but I knew she wasn't a rebound. I held my breath through it for three months of it, because she was so good and I didn't know how to hurt her. We weren't all we could be, though. she always knew there was something off about me, lost eye contact, moments where the conversation seeped from the room and the silence wasn't easy. After i couldn't take it anymore, I told her I needed time because I didn't know how to heal myself when there was someone else there putting their own skin against the wound.

I told her not to wait but she did. quietly, on my periphery. We spoke like friends but we weren't quite that. I took four months to meditate and focus on what it means to be an individual. I healed. I saw her again in june, she came to see the new apartment and I sat next to her on the couch and I couldn't keep my eyes off of her.

I felt new, and I was ready. I was myself again, the regrets of winter and bitterness of fall settled into memories and she wasn't wanting without getting anymore because I was there.

Every other love I ever had or just held was too hot or too cold, burned and fizzled short and rocky. with her, though, it grew. It was not comfortable at first because we both put on a face for everyone that isn't our own but that began to melt when we were together and now I sometimes struggle to recognize my thoughts as separate from hers. She is the most human person I know. I recognize the sacredness in her as I recognize the sacredness in me. I don't know if we will be together forever, but that doesn't matter. I do know that we will be together until we have nothing left to learn from each other, whether that's two months or twenty years from now. She is everything i need in my life right now, and I grow with her every day.